Millie has had the same Last Supper jigsaw puzzle on the table for eight days. Some days, she pretends to work the puzzle, but actually puts no pieces into it. When she thinks we're not looking, she stares out the window, then falls asleep in the chair.
Yesterday, Day 542, She had been frustrated about not placing any pieces into the puzzle, so I put one in while she watched. The puzzle piece had the image of a woman's face, so it was easy to find where it belonged, near the top of the border. Millie said "That doesn't go there."
Me: "Why not?"
Millie: "Because look at the tiny shape next to it. There are no pieces that shape."
Me: "Let's see if I can find one. Yes! What about this one? Look, it fits."
Millie: "Yes it fits because I just put a different woman's face piece where you had put your piece." (she hadn't. she was just sitting there while I found that small piece).
This interchange is typical of how she converses. She just makes things up. When during the first six months she lived with us I took her to the doctors office, she would deny having the troubles that she had complained to me about at home!
As a caregiver who actually cares about facts, this characteristic is one of the hardest to get used to in the past 542 days.
I just read an interesting account of this phenomenon here, and why we shouldn't argue with dementia
Hubby and I talk about her need to be right. He says that she has always been this way. Always, even when he was very young. He says it's imprinted into the fabric of her. I guess that means that her Alzheimer's is not the only thing preventing us from talking sense with her.
This puzzle business happened an hour after a session of looking at old photos from Millie's past, where she mis-identified a baby held by her daughter with "that's Elizabeth. I know it because at some point I wrote on the back of the photo that I thought it was Elizabeth."
I said "No, that's not Elizabeth, it's baby Paul that Flora is holding. I know, because I took this photo!" I thought she would WANT to know which of her grandchildren that her daughter was holding.
She came back with "Look, see what I wrote on the back? It says 'I think this is Elizabeth'. " (There's a lot going on here, including the effect of the written word, wrong though it might be.)
Yesterday, Day 542, She had been frustrated about not placing any pieces into the puzzle, so I put one in while she watched. The puzzle piece had the image of a woman's face, so it was easy to find where it belonged, near the top of the border. Millie said "That doesn't go there."
Me: "Why not?"
Millie: "Because look at the tiny shape next to it. There are no pieces that shape."
Me: "Let's see if I can find one. Yes! What about this one? Look, it fits."
Millie: "Yes it fits because I just put a different woman's face piece where you had put your piece." (she hadn't. she was just sitting there while I found that small piece).
This interchange is typical of how she converses. She just makes things up. When during the first six months she lived with us I took her to the doctors office, she would deny having the troubles that she had complained to me about at home!
As a caregiver who actually cares about facts, this characteristic is one of the hardest to get used to in the past 542 days.
I just read an interesting account of this phenomenon here, and why we shouldn't argue with dementia
Hubby and I talk about her need to be right. He says that she has always been this way. Always, even when he was very young. He says it's imprinted into the fabric of her. I guess that means that her Alzheimer's is not the only thing preventing us from talking sense with her.
This puzzle business happened an hour after a session of looking at old photos from Millie's past, where she mis-identified a baby held by her daughter with "that's Elizabeth. I know it because at some point I wrote on the back of the photo that I thought it was Elizabeth."
I said "No, that's not Elizabeth, it's baby Paul that Flora is holding. I know, because I took this photo!" I thought she would WANT to know which of her grandchildren that her daughter was holding.
She came back with "Look, see what I wrote on the back? It says 'I think this is Elizabeth'. " (There's a lot going on here, including the effect of the written word, wrong though it might be.)
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